I'm a Princess

I was Ana from Frozen. I was a Disney Princess! I wore the dress, the shoes, had the hair, sang the songs, I was a princess!

So, this past Thursday a handful of people from my university here in Sevilla volunteered to go to a local elementary school and hang out with the kids; play some games, sing songs, take pictures. Also, my friend Monica and I dressed up as Ana and Elsa from Frozen to surprise the kids. I honestly don’t think I’ve had more fun in my entire life. I’m pretty sure I was more stoked about me being Ana than the kids were.

We walked down the streets of Sevilla to the school having multiple people stare at us and a few people ask if they could take our pictures. We also had another classmate dressed as Olaf. When we entered the school the kids began to freak out, laughing, screaming, clapping. Man it was great!

We then attempting to sing ‘Do You Want to Build a Snowman’, but that somewhat failed because the kids were way too excited. Then we split them into groups and Elsa and I (Ana) walked around meeting all of the little kids.

75, 3 to 5 year olds in a small room. Interesting and very adorable! I wanted to eat them all right up! (They do say that here all the time, so for all of you who think I’m weird saying I want to eat children’s faces, that is completely normal here!)

During the craft time, Elsa, Olaf, and I posed for pictures with each of the little kiddos. My face hurt so much afterward from smiling so much! Also during craft time we went around and visited a few classrooms with the older students to say hi and get a few pictures with them as well.

At the end we all sang “Let it go” in English and then in Spanish. Hearing all of the kids shout “sueltelo” or “let it go” in English.

I have honestly never been so happy in all of my life! I swear I had more fun than the kids. I never wanted to take that costume off.

My dream of becoming a Disney princess came true! Even if just for a few short hours!

Dear Disney, you shouldn’t discriminate against tall people being princesses at Disney World. It’s not our fault we’re tall!

Thursday was a pretty great day.

This week I have classes on Wednesday and Friday and then next week is my last week here. WOW. I’m ready to be home, but I’m also not ready to be home because I love this place and these people. Yesterday my friends and I completed our goal of eating at every ice cream shop on the walk to our apartments. A grand total of six. Now only if we could do it all in one day I would be in Heaven. Friday night I went to my first discoteca (club) and finally felt like a real Spaniard! Saturday night I had a sleepover with two of my friends. A sleepover! In Spain! They don't usually do that here. I felt like an American again. This week with only have two days of class I'll be working on some projects, studying for my finals, and exploring parts of Sevilla that I still have to see.

Anyways, I'll be home in 11 days so I will see you all soon!

Forever Giving Thanks

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Yes I know I'm late, but my computer hasn’t been connecting to the internet.

So life in Spain has been pretty darn awesome and I can’t believe I only have less than three weeks left here. So bittersweet…

Last week was Thanksgiving, as most of you know. Usually during Thanksgiving my family and I head up north to our cabin to spend the weekend together; hunting, cooking, and cutting down our Christmas tree. It’s a tradition that I hold so very near to my heart and one that I cherish dearly. However, this year I spent it away from my family, in a different country, with people I’ve only known for three months. Man oh man was that food delicious though! I do have to say, it was the best Thanksgiving I spent away from my family.

We started the morning off with an American breakfast at school. I got to help fry the bacon on top of the roof. I fried bacon. On a roof. In Sevilla! So happy! I love cooking and miss it a lot! I ate seven pieces of French Toast, scrambled eggs, and three pieces of bacon. Pretty sure I gained a thousand pounds, but it was totally worth it. After breakfast we watched a movie in the school and then returned to our houses for the afternoon where I took a solid two hour nap. Thanksgiving night our school invited us to a restaurant call Las Lapas for an American Thanksgiving dinner; turkey, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, green beans, corn, stuffing, dinner rolls, pumpkin pie, and apple pie. I’ve never eaten so much for Thanksgiving in my life! We also exchanged Secret Santa gifts and nice things that we said about each other. It was such a good time and I’m so thankful that the school invited us. SO GOOD! Afterward my friends and I explored Sevilla for a while and then returned home.

Friday we didn’t have school, so I spent my weekend relaxing, working on homework, talking to my family, and walking around Sevilla.

It was hard being away during an American holiday without my family, but the Thanksgiving I had here sure was one for the books.

I’ve found myself enjoying my time here so much more knowing that I only have three weeks left. The sunrises every morning, working out on my rooftop, meals with my host mami, time with my friends, every ice cream eating opportunity, and even my classes.

Last night one of my professors invited us to her house for tea, coffee, and Christmas cookies. She even made us an American coffee cake! I tell ya, the people here are so attentive and hospitable.

I am so thankful for my time here in Spain. It has been something I will never forget. Every experience has been a new one and a great one. My transition into a new country, living with a new family, sharing a bedroom, attending classes all in Spanish, and walking everywhere could not have gone more smoothly.

I will forever give thanks for this opportunity, these people, this country.

I come home in a few short weeks where I will resume my life as a typical American for two weeks and then embark on another journey to Ecuador for two weeks.

Until then, I plan on enjoying my time here in Sevilla, exploring parts of the city I still have not seen, spending time with my friends, studying hard, but mostly enjoying every opportunity God gives to me.

Side notes: The weather here is changing; cold in the mornings and warmish in the afternoon, but it is funny to see everyone, including myself, dressed in winter coats and scarves. The days are shorter, but the sun still shines pretty much every day. I have two projects and four tests to do/study for for the last week of classes. This coming week I only have school on Wednesday and Friday, so hopefully I can get a lot of my studying out of the way then and do a little bit of traveling and exploring Sevilla.

Well, that’s all for now folks, sorry it’s been a while since my last update.

Life is good, God is good, and my family and friends are great.

See you all soon!

Everybody Wants To Love, Everybody Wants To Be Loved

I am now entering my 11th week here in Spain with only 5 more weeks to go :( Seriously, why does time fly by so fast?! I don't like it!

Life update:

The week I had off from school was so very much needed and wonderful. I think I honestly forgot what it felt like to relax and do things without an agenda. Although getting back into school was a bit rough. I had two tests this past week that were supposed to be back to back on the same day, but (thankfully) one of our profs was sick the day before so it was pushed back a day. Thursday was our last Flamenco dance class :( But our "performance" is tomorrow and I'm super stoked! I haven't performed a dance routine since high school and I've missed it!

Friday we left for a school excursion to Granada and visited La Alhambra; an Arabic Palace that is extremely breathtaking. Hiked about a thousand miles uphill to get to a lookout point over the city with an amazing view of La Alhambra, the sunset, Granada, and part of the Sierra Nevada mountains that had snow on its peaks! Ahhh! Snow! The next day we visited the church where Ferdinand and Isabel's bodies are; that was cool and kind of gross all at the same time. Then friends and I went shopping in the stores that are very similar to those in Morocco. Then we went to a grocery store and bought a Granada (which means Pomegranate in English) so we were eating a Pomegranate in the city of Pomegranate; that was pretty awesome. We also didn't have a knife or anything to cut it open with, so I was going to take out my credit card knife that I always have in my wallet, but unfortunately had to leave it in America. So instead I cut it open with an actual credit card. I was fairly proud of this little innovative moment of my life :)

This past week was a very interesting one with the results of the elections. Living in a foreign country, where everyone hates our future president, attending a school where not everyone is a conservative Christian like I am used to is challenging. I'm not even in my own country where it is all going down and I feel the side affects. I know you're all sick of political posts, so I'm not going to tell you which side is right and which side is wrong.


Today my devotions were talking about the cooperation of teams, and man do I know that life well. I played sports starting in Kindergarten all the way through Sophomore year of college, that is fifteen years of my life. I know what it's like to be on a team. Even if you've never played sports you know what it's like to be on a team too; for school projects, relationships, or jobs. We've all been a part of a team at some point in our lives. My devotions pointed out that if we all cooperate then together we are invincible. We are a team, a country, the body of Christ, His children, a family. We are living with each other; in the same house, street, town, city, county, state, country, world. Like it or not people, we're kind of stuck with each other until Jesus comes back. My devotions then went on to say that if one fails, we all fail.

SO TRUE!

I voted. Many people are worried about what will happen. Many people are ecstatic about what the future holds. People, we all live in the same country! We were all created for the same purpose-to serve God and love His people, even when we have different political views. Let's stop rioting and hating on people who are "different" from us. We were all created as children of God, in the image of God. I know we can't all be perfect all the time, actually that can never happen, but we can strive to be our best. I know there is sin in the world, I face it and fight against it every day, I'm not perfect, I have huge struggles, I judge, I lie, I think badly about myself, I don't trust God- I am a sinner. We are all sinners- yet another thing we all have in common. If we dug deep, we would find a lot of similarities. We want what's best for our families and generations to come. We want the hate in this world to stop. We want to change the world and make it a better place, but think that because we are only one voice we won't be heard; What if we added hundreds, thousands, millions of voices, then would we be heard? Maybe why not instead of fighting against each other we join hands and fight against the only thing truly evil in this world? Sin. Maybe I'm too optimistic or too sheltered to think this could actually happen, but if God can change my life and pull me out of the deep dark holes of sin that I have lived in, I know if we allowed Him, He can do that for everyone.

I mean it when I say I love all of you; if you're homosexual, a different skin color, religion, social class than I am, if I've met you one, if we haven't talked in a very long time, I still love you, because you are my family.

I usually share my blogs on Facebook, so in order to be my Facebook friend I had to have met you at least once, that means that at some point in my life you had significance and changed my life, even only for a single moment. I love you all.

Let's do a little more lovin' and a lot less hatin' and see where that gets us.

Don't Worry, Be Overjoyed

I’ve been here in Spain for two months now! Two months! WOW! I have so much enjoyed my time here and I don’t want it to end, but I’ll admit, I miss home and I’m ready to be there, but I know I will never have this opportunity again, so I’m trying not to wish it away.

This past week was my last week of school before our break! WE DON’T HAVE ANY SCHOOL NEXT WEEK! Woot Woot! This past week was pretty normal and chill. I didn’t have much homework, thank goodness! Tuesday afternoon I worked tutoring two little girls in English; very tricky. Wednesday after classes our school had an early Halloween party and I dressed up as a CRIME MAKER, AKA “burglar,” but because I’m Michaela and I couldn’t think of the work for criminal/burglar in English I kept saying Crime Maker! I think I like that title better anyways :) Wednesday afternoon, I helped lead worship night at school. Thursday night we went out for Pizza at Domino’s and for ice cream with our mami. Delicious! I honestly don’t think I’ve ever had Domino’s pizza before coming here to Spain. Ironic huh? Friday: last day of classes! And the day that practically everyone in my school and even my teachers left to travel other parts of Europe.

We have this week off and I’ve heard that it’s because our profs want to give us time to travel the world without having to miss 500 days of school. I’ll admit I’m completely jealous of all my friends who are currently traveling in Italy, Ireland, Switzerland, and other countries around Spain. I decided to stay in Sevilla for a few reasons; I’m saving money, I’m going to Ecuador at the end of this semester, so I couldn’t necessarily justify going on a $300-$500 trip to Ireland, even though that’s all I wanted to do here in Spain. I’m also spending the week exploring this beautiful city I live in, spending more time with my host mom and sister, learning to cook traditional Spanish meals (like my favorite, Tortilla de Patatas), and spending time with the four other people who decided to stay here. I know now is the time to do the world traveling that I want because I’m here and I’m single and not tied down, but honestly, I have my entire life to travel! I’d love to travel with my husband and family and friends! I have (hopefully) 80 more years for traveling! And if not, heaven is 1,000 times better.

I want to talk a little bit about being content where we are.

My current situation; although I would rather be traveling Europe, I am happy staying here in Sevilla. This city has so much to offer! And a lot of it is free thank goodness. Yesterday my friend and I spent the afternoon exploring parts of Sevilla that we’ve never seen or only seen once or twice. It was wonderful! We had no agenda (other than to eat ice cream), we had no time frame, we walked aimlessly throughout the small streets, took the time to snap pictures of things we walk past every day, we even people watched! (I was thinking of you mom.) It was nice. I have plans to visit (FREE) museums, parks, and even go to the zoo one day! I’m excited to know the city I live in better. I may rather be traveling, but for now, I’m content being where I’m at right here in Sevilla.

If you would have asked me a year ago if I was glad to be single I would have laughed in your face. I went through a break-up, and as much as I played it cool and didn’t care, I cared. A lot. It sucked! It still sucks! All my friends kept telling me there are many fish left, it was his loss, you’re going to enjoy being single and I honestly just wanted to tell them all to shut up and that they didn’t understand what I was going through.

Now if you’d ask me if I’m glad I am still single, I wouldn’t laugh, but I still wouldn’t say “oh yes, I’m ecstatic”. But being single can be a great thing. I honestly probably wouldn’t be here in Spain if I was still in that relationship. I wouldn’t have some of the friends I have today. I probably wouldn’t be as close to my parents as I am now.

I’m 20, I’m single, two of my friends just got engaged, and all but one of my friends are dating the people they will most likely marry. That sucks. Don’t get me wrong, I am so overjoyed for them! Seriously guys I’m so happy for you! They’ve found their person, the one they love and will marry and that brings me so much joy.

I’m 20 and I’m single. My mom was married for two years at my age. I feel the pressure! But over the past year, even the past six months, I’ve learned to be content with being single. Enjoying my time to be myself, to spend as much time with my friends and family as I want, to focus on my relationship with God rather than a guy. Yes, I desire to be married and have kids someday (hopefully not too far away). But for now, I’m content being where I’m at in this stage of singleness.

Two years ago I was in my first semester of freshman year at Grace College; my home away from home. I had never been so happy than I was at that school. My roommates instantly became my best friends. My friends were my family. My team was always there for me. The campus was beautiful. The town was perfect and quaint. However, two years ago, when I went home for fall break I decided that I was going to change schools and move back home all to save some money. I hated the decision I made and even today I wish I could go back and decide to stay at Grace. Leaving my home away from home was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I miss it so much. I miss my friends, my team, my small town of Winona lake. Even now it makes me tear up.                   Miss you cuties :) 

But God has a plan, right? He brought me to Cornerstone for a reason. I met some amazing friends, I live at home with my awesome family, I met a lady who has changed my life, I had an amazing volleyball team, I learned how to adapt and step out of my comfort zone, I’m here in Spain! I have resented my time at Cornerstone, but for now I’m content being where I’m at in a new and different school.

I’m a college student; that almost automatically implies that money has, is, and will always be an issue. I’m a huge worrier. The “what-ifs” in life constantly consume my thoughts. What if I can’t pay for college? What if I don’t graduate? What if I don’t get a stable job? What if I don’t get married? What if I can’t have kids? What if my parents die? What if…? God has taught me so much patience and trust in the past six months. I had no idea how I was going to pay for this semester in Spain, and I still don’t really know how I’m going to. But I know God does and I know He will help me every step of the way. I work in a nursing home, I love my job, my coworkers, my residents, but I don’t like the pay so much. Money, why do you exist? Yeah, I don’t know either. But for now, I’m content being where I’m at with my financial situation.

Like I said in a blog a few weeks ago, joy is not dependent on our circumstances it is dependent on our attitude about our circumstances.

Don’t just be content. Be overjoyed.

Thanks for reading my blog! I love you and I’ll see y’all soon!

An Update On My Life!

Hey guys! Sorry I haven't written about my life for a while! I've just been so busy soaking up everything SPAIN! Wow, I just looked back and it's been almost 20 days since I last wrote an update about life here. Well during those past three weeks I've done a lot! Here's the scoop:

Two weeks ago I traveled to Toledo with my school for a two day trip and that was awesome! Toledo is a beautiful city with winding and steep streets, so the leg workout there was definitely one for the books. We visited a couple churches/cathedrals, explored the city, and took some great photos! Friends and I went out for pizza for supper which was DELICIOUS! Then we returned to Sevilla the next day. On Saturday a group of friends and I went hiking in a place called El Torcal. Holy Guacamole was that place gorgeous! It was simply rock formations, but it was so beautiful! The leaves were beginning to change colors, I climbed a freakin' mountain, and had a picnic right in the middle of the beautiful place. Man, I still can't get over how breathtaking it was! I seriously just want to go back and spend a week climbing every single rock/mountain.


The following weekend I was sick :( so I stayed inside all weekend, slept, and I finished a book I've been writing for 10+ years. Yes a book, like a novel, and yes I'm going to try to get it published so y'all will have to wait until you see it on the bookshelves! :)
This was a huge accomplishment for me. I've been working on this book for so long, never having the motivation, time, or excuse to finish it! But since I was stuck inside for two whole days, in a foreign country, with no appetite, I sat down and wrote the 30+ pages I needed to finish it. Not saying that it's any good or a best seller or anything, but I'm proud of my work.

This past week I had two exams; one I didn't do horrible on and I thought I was going to and one I hopefully did pretty well on-fingers crossed!

Yesterday our school took a day trip to Ronda (another beautiful small city here in Spain) and we explored the city, climbed down then up 300+ stairs to the bottom of the ravine next to the river, ate our lunch in a park overlooking a huge cliff/drop off, then visited a bull-fighting ring!

This coming week is my last week of school until I have a week off. Now most of my friends/everyone in the program except me and one of my friends are leaving Spain and traveling around Europe. I'm completely bummed and totally jealous of everyone that is going somewhere, but at the end of this semester I'm going to Ecuador for two weeks and I need to keep reminding myself of that. Plus having a week to explore Sevilla and hang out with my host mom isn't so bad!

You know, God has a funny way with timing. But also a great way with timing. If I lived my entire life on my own time schedule I wouldn't be enjoying half of the things I am doing and enjoying now! God knows everything that we need and when we need it and He does a heck of a lot better at caring for us than we do at caring for ourselves.

God is also so creative. He is the best artist in the universe and I think that says a lot. Whenever I am out in God's creation, that is when I feel closest to Him. He has created every little thing in this world and how lucky am I that I get to experience it.

I may not be rich, I may not have a high paying job, I may not have a boyfriend, I may not have any pets (except for my lovely fish JC), I may not have a brand new wardrobe or new modeled car, but I am spoiled. I am blessed. I'm studying in Spain! I'm living with a host mother whom I love and a roommate whom I get along with! I have fantastic friends here and this country is beautiful! I have fantastic family and friends who love me and send me love even when I'm 4,000+ miles away. I am so blessed.

God, thank you for this opportunity, thank you for your creation and your people, and thank you for your unconditional, never ending, perfect love!

I return home in T-55 days!!! I miss you all and can't wait to see your faces!

50 Things I'd Like To Say To My Big Brother

To my big brother:

1. Thank you for picking on me and calling me names. I actually secretly love being called rat.

2. Thank you for teaching me common sense and survival tips…

3. …and how to shoot guns. I am now the most BA chick I know.

4. Thank you for the nightly burping and farting contests when we were younger. I'm a champ.

5. Thank you for teaching me patience. Not that you taught me how do be patient, but you give me 

the practice I need.

6. Thanks for being the naughty child so now I can get away with anything :)

7. Quit walking around the house without pants on, I don’t care for your white legs.

8. Thank you for being the protective brother we both know you are, even when you don’t show it, I know you care.

9. Thank you for giving me hard shoes to fill in high school. All our teachers always liked you better.

10. Thank you for letting me borrow your clothes when I feel the need to wear your comfy sweatshirts and/or not killing me when you find out I do

11. Thank you for not dating my friends…

12. …but anyone you do decide to date has to be pre-approved by me.

13. I need your fashion advice every now and then…

14. …and your relationship/boy advice.

15. I can now become a lawyer because of how good I’ve gotten at arguing with you, so thank you for the practice.

16. I will always like the same things as you. No matter what.

17. I’d pick you as my person in a zombie apocalypse.

18. You’re paying for mom and dad’s nursing home.

19. I can’t wait for you to get married so I can finally have the sister I’ve always wanted. Get on that soon please.

20. I can’t wait for you to have kids so I can spoil my little nieces and nephews. I want at least four.

21. I’ve always got your back.

22. Sorry about the times that I tattled on you…

23. … and got you in trouble.

24. Your secrets are always safe with me.

25. I’ll always volunteer as your designated driver.

26. I never mean to embarrass you in front of your friends…

27. …I honestly just want to hang out with you. All the time.

28. Your opinion matters to me…

29. …and I love receiving your advice.

30. All those times of locking me in my bedroom and tying me to trees has really paid off. You’ve made me a stronger person.

31. I will always help you hide the body or bail you out of jail.

32. Growing up, I always wanted to be just like you and do everything that my big brother did, that’s probably why you find me so annoying.

33. I don’t like it when you’re hurting; physically or emotionally…

34. …so I’ll gladly beat someone up for you. Just tell me who.

35. My friends think you’re attractive and that’s weird.

36. You’re a cool cat.

37. You’re an odd cookie.

38. You’re going to be a great husband and daddy.

39. You’re smart...but not as smart as me.

40. You’re a good singer, especially when you think no one is home and you’re belting it out in the shower.

41. You’re a good dancer...after a couple drinks.

42. Please make wise decisions in life because as much as we fight I never want to lose you.

43. I know you’re headed somewhere important in life.

44. You’re extremely funny.

45. You can do anything with your life because you’re great at everything and very hard working.

46. I look up to and admire you and…

47. …I hope to be just like you when I grow up, well at least somewhat like you.

48. You’re seriously great at anything and everything…

49. …and I’m extremely jealous of that fact.

50. I am SO proud of you.

BONUS

51. I love you little guy. Please promise me that we can still be friends after mom and dad die and we live in different houses.

Miss you mucho!

Hospitality: A Universal Language

Can I just take a moment to boast about how great God is?

This past Sunday I swung by Sao Rafael, Portugal for the day. Yes I went to a different country just for a quick day trip, and let me tell you friends, it was so amazing. I can't even begin to describe to you how beautiful the beach was and the rocks and caves and crystal clear water. It was breathtaking and I tried my best to soak it all in. Of course I took pictures and the pictures turned out great, but there's something about seeing things in real life; they're just so much better.

My friend Monica and I spent hours exploring. We swam around a few cliffs to explore some caves (which we didn't actually go into, but should have), we climbed some rocks and jumped off of them, and we climbed some cliffs and explored those. I can't even describe to you how magnificent the view was. But here's -->
a little view for ya. We were so in awe of how great God is and how beautiful of an artist He is. We just started singing "How Great is Our God". Maybe we sounded awful to the man sitting 15 feet away from us, but in that moment I could not have been more content or satisfied with my life.

Seriously, if you have the chance, go visit this place and bring shoes, sunscreen, and goggles.

The rest of my week last week was fairly good. It was a shorter week with not having some classes, unfortunately due to the death of the father of one of my professors. It was also a week full of exams. I did great on some and not so great on others, but I can only up from here! Right?

It was also a week of HUGE changes and decisions for me.

I have decided to change my major and I am no longer studying elementary education and I am now going for Spanish (major) with a Business Management minor. I didn't feel called to teach or have the die hard passion like most people in the education program have and that was something I had been debating ever since I chose education as my major. I'm not entirely sure what I will do with my major, although my dream is to become a translator in a hospital, but I feel a lot more relaxed about my future now. Until the next difficulty arises.
I have also decided that two weeks after I get home from Spain I am going to study abroad in Quito, Ecuador for 2 weeks!

Yes, I know, I'm crazy and I'm spoiled. But what great opportunities God has presented to me! Yeah I'll be broke when I get home, but I trust God.

HE IS SO GREAT!

So, let's talk about hospitality, the title of this blog post.

Last Wednesday at my school's worship night, our awesome Missions coordinator talked about hospitality. This was Cornerstone's chapel theme for last semester, so I wasn't too enthusiastic to hear yet another spiel on what hospitality is and what it means to be hospitable. But then I got to thinking about my host mom and the people at the church I've gone to. Maybe my host mom isn't a Christian, it's hard to know, but she is so kind, gracious, and very hospitable. I have been blessed by her in so many ways.

Yeah, she may be kind of forced to invite me into her home, since it is where I have now been living for a little over a month (WOWZA!), but the way she makes me feel AT home is indescribable. The other day I was telling her about my favorite american foods and French Toast was something that came to mind (man I miss that stuff.) She asked me what it was and how to make it, then come Saturday morning I wake up and she says she's going to make me French Toast for breakfast.

How sweet is that?! Seriously! They usually just eat toast and coffee here for breakfast, but she took the time to go to the market, buy the ingredients, cook, and serve me French Toast. Yeah, it may have tasted a bit different, and there was no syrup, but it was the thought that counted!

She also tells us we can help ourselves to whatever we want and that we don't have to ever be afraid to ask for something. Which is funny because I'm always afraid to ask for more toilet paper when ours is out because I feel like we go through it so quickly. Yes, I know, I'm strange. But anyways....

Hospitality, that someone in every country can do and something that is understood by all. It is a universal language like love, and it is a way to show love.

John 13:35 "By this everyone will know you are my disciples, if you love one another."

Love,
Michaela

PS: When I get back to the states I want everyone to pronounce my name how they do in Spanish, it's much more beautiful. (Me-kai-la)

Eternal Joy

I am entering my fourth week here in Spain. That's one month that I've been in a new country. Holy tuna! Didn't I just get here like 2 days ago?
Oh my lanta I love this city, this country, this tiny homey apartment, my mami, my friends, my school, my church, and did I mention this city?

So this week was a little more difficult for me; missing the fam, not being with my bestfriend on her birthday to celebrate (sorry Manders!), not being able to eat a gallon of ice cream after a rough day, my work and all of my people there, my little Hendrik (I miss your face little man!), my weekly trips to Costco for lunch, my cabin, not being able to get hugs from people I love the most. A lot of things and people were especially missed this week,

This past week I had my first test and paper due here in Spain and man was that stressful, but I think it went well. Fingers crossed. I also had some decisions to make about my future (that I'm still working on) and it was rough not being able to sit at home and discuss it with my people. But yet all week my mind kept going back to something my friend told me. She sent me a letter the other week and in it she wrote so many encouraging words and Bible verses.

One of the Bible verses you will find below.

Habakkuk 3:17-19 "Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my savior. The Sovereign LORD is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to tread on the heights."

In the letter she proceeded to tell me that her mother wrote next to this verse in her Bible, and I'll paraphrase it, "We need to live in the true joy of God's presence and stay in constant communication with Him. Joy is not dependent on our circumstances and we need to have a thankful attitude."

Joy is not dependent on how our lives our going, or at least it shouldn't be. We should be thankful in all circumstances. I mean look at Job. He had literally nothing, yet his faith stood strong.

I'm in Spain so naturally I should be ecstatic, right? But when I miss my people, it's a bit hard to choose joy. But that's something I think we all need to work on. Eternal joy, in all circumstances.

This week wasn't all bad, so don't think that I'm not enjoying my time here, because I definitely am I never want it to end!

I got to paint fans this week and although my artistic skills are that of a two-year old I had fun. I had my first flamenco dance class. That was fun... and interesting. My forearms have never been so sore. I also went for a run, yeah, big mistake. Probably won't be doing that again any time soon or ever. I also got to Facetime my mommy at work so I could say hi to all my favorite residents. This made my heart so happy I actually cried. I also had the house to myself for a few hours last night, so you know what I did? Blasted some Carrie Underwood, probably broke the neighbors eardrums with my horrible singing, and danced around the house barefoot!

God is a pretty cool dude and I'm so grateful that I get to be here.

P.S. Birthday shoutout to Amanda Joy! I love you so much and I'm so grateful for you! You're so strong, encouraging, funny, and you have a beautiful soul. Shine brightly darling!

Libre Soy--I Am Free

Amigos, I can't believe how quickly my time in Sevilla has already gone by and yet how slowly it has passed. In the past couple weeks I have made some amazing friends that I feel like I've known for a long time. It's so great and I love it. I even traveled with them yesterday and the day before to Córdoba and Malaga, which was so great!

Traveling on my own, without my parents, in another country, with friends. Wow, I'm definitely an adult. That's scary. But also so amazing. I am free.

Today I went to a church with these friends and the message was based on 1 Samuel 3. It was all in Spanish and I believe and hope I understood it all. The pastor preached on the fact that Samuel was a young boy, who heard God, and asked Him to speak to [Samuel] because he was ready to serve. We also sang two songs that consisted of a variation of the phrase, "Libre soy", meaning I am free.

Not only am I free in the sense that I live in another country, but I'm also free from my sins. Friends that's something so amazing that God does for us. He frees us. He saves us. He loves us. Despite of what we do. I am free. Goodness gracious, God is so good, I love it.

So, recap of my week:

Last week Sunday night I had the opportunity to go with my host mom to an assisted living center. We visited with her mother and some of the other ladies there and this was such a precious time for me. Then on Thursday people from my school went to play BINGO at another assisted living center for men. They were all flirts, funny, and very cute. It reminded me of my job back in the states, which I miss so much! I miss the constant love from my people there, the compliments, and the care.

Work fam, I miss all of you a lot! I can't wait to see you guys again!

Also this week, I helped lead the singing in our schools praise night on Wednesday. It was incredible.

Fun fact about me; I love singing, but singing in front of people makes me want to gouge my eyes out! It makes me so nervous! But this week I did it, and not only did I do it, I helped lead it, and not only did I help lead it, but people complimented my singing voice! I can't even tell you how great that made me feel!

And last but not least, the greatest highlight of my week. A lady who works at our school who has daughters who are about 5 and 7 years old and are obsessed with the movie Frozen, asked me and another girl if we would, sometime this semester, dress up as Elsa and Anna and go to their school and perform for their classes. When she asked me this I about cried because I was so happy. I have always wanted to be a Disney Princess, but Disney discriminates against tall people. Guys! I could be a Disney Princess for a day! Get out, shut the front door, and tell me this is a dream! Eek!

And what kind of blogster would I be if I didn't wrap all of this info into one lesson at the end. The most well known song from Frozen is "Let it Go", which coincidentally enough is named in Spanish (the Mexico version though) "Libre Soy", which translates to "I Am Free".

So friends; I am free, you are free, I love Spain, God loves you, classes are great, friends are awesome, I get to be a Disney freakin Princess, and I really miss my family and friends!

You Are A Good Good Father

I've been in Spain for over a week...what??? That can't be true! I feel like I've been here for so long already and yet not long enough! But no worries, I still got just a few more weeks before I come back home. Just a few.

I have loved practically every moment I have been here. And I say 'practically every moment' because there have been times when I wish I wasn't in a country that only speaks Spanish. Like when I get lost (it's only happened like once. Ok maybe twice.)

The first week of school went really well. Yes, all of my classes are in Spanish. No, I don't understand every word they're saying. But I get the gist of it and I'm learning a lot! However, this whole thinking, speaking, reading, writing, even dreaming in Spanish thing is pretty exhausting. By the end of the school day I have a huge headache; either because my brain has been running on all cylinders for 6+ hours or because it's so hot here my brain is actually expanding. But it is cooling down, so that's a plus! (It's still an average of like 95 degrees.)

My host mom is great! We cry laughing about twice a day; either at something we said horribly wrong in Spanish or her trying to attempt English. It's great and I love her.

This city of Sevilla is incredible! This past week I had the opportunity to go to the top of a very popular, tall, modern art piece called "Las Setas"           (The Mushrooms--pictured here>)
When we got to the top, you could see the entire city and more. It was incredible (more pictures on Facebook.) I didn't realize how big Sevilla was. Before I arrived here I imagined a small city with a bunch of little homes on the outskirts. Not at all what Sevilla is.

Although I am not much of a city girl and would much rather be put out in the woods in the middle of nowhere with nothing but the sound of leaves rustling in the trees and squirrels scampering by, this city has grown on me. Although it is not normal to smile at every one you pass on the street here, the people are kind, friendly, and very helpful to us gringas.

Alright, now I want to tell you all about how awesome God is. Or at least attempt to tell you, because there really aren't even words invented to describe how incredible He is.

If you read my blog a couple weeks ago, right before I left, you'll know that I was boasting about how faithful God has been through the little things in life, like spare change. Well the other day I found my first of many coins here in Spain laying on the ground. It was only .05 euros, but I picked it up anyways, stuck it in my pocket, and thanked God.

How awesome is He?! Even thousands of miles away from my home, God continues to be so faithful! Ahh, it just makes me so excited!

Here I am in another country, with total strangers, a different language, and a completely different culture. Like, we're not even supposed to take our shoes off in the house. But yet God blesses, God knows, and God loves.

The other night I had the opportunity to go to a 3 hour long worship service, but you know what? I'm not even complaining, because it was so badly needed and I loved every moment. Yes, there's a language barrier, the music was in Spanish, songs I didn't know, the little messages were in Spanish and I probably understood about .02% of what was said. But during the middle of singing a song I stopped and realized that in two different languages, with people from at least two different countries thousands of miles apart, with many different aged people, we were all praising the same God.

WOW!
                                                                           
That's all my mind can come up with. WOW. To be able to experience God in different parts of the world, in so many different ways, let me tell you, it's incredible. In the midst of all the chaos in the world and in our lives, moving across the world, studying a completely different language, being without my family and friends, God remains the same, steady, and constant. He does not change. He does not move. He does not abandon us. He loves. He is faithful.

You are a good good father, it's who you are. And WE are loved by you.
Check out this song. It's good :)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CqybaIesbuA

Estoy en España!

Hola amigos!

I made it to Spain safe and sound as you may have seen/heard via social media. The internet really is a great thing some times.

My days here have been so few but they've already been so awesome! For example, right now I'm sitting out on our balcony writing this sitting across from a beautiful church. I love my life!

I won't give you a boring play by play about each of my days here but I can tell you they've been nothing but great!
Typical day so far:
7:30-Wake up and get ready
8:00-Breakfast! Usually consists of pan tostado (toast) and some fruit and coffee (which I don't drink)
8:30-Leave for school. Although classes don't start until tomorrow we've had a few days of orientations and registrations. I live about 20 minutes away from school so by time I get there I'm already covered in sweat. Because it's approximately 80-90 degrees in the morning.
9:000-2:00-School. Our school is pretty neat! We have a roof (obviously) but on top of the roof there's a little terrace that we can chill out on and look over the city. Only one rule: we can't jump off it. Shocker!
2:30-3:00-Lunch time! Lunch here is eaten way later then in America but it's ok because my mami feeds us well and it's the biggest meal of the day. Also, my mami is a reflexologist so she works until about 4 which is very unusual (I'll explain later) So my roomie, Rachel and I eat when we get home around 2:30
2:00-5:00-Siesta time! No Spaniards don't take a 3 hour nap every day. This is a time in the day when it is literally too hot to do anything outside, so mostly every store closes and people go home for work, relax in their homes, which really aren't that much cooler than outside, and sometimes they sleep for an hour max.
5:00-9:00-Hangout at home, go out with friends, whatever
9:30-10:30ish-Super time! Yes, they eat supper this late. Why? I don't know. Actually it's because it's too hot to eat any earlier and we'd all die of heat exhaustion.
10:30-1:30-Party time! No I don't actually go out and party all the time, but this is a very popular time for people to be out and about drinking, at the club, eating tapas, or helado, and it's great! Although the whole staying up late thing doesn't suite me well, but I'm working on it.

So if you're still reading my very exciting blog, God bless you.

My mami/señora/Maria is absolutely great! She was a little hard to understand at first, but it's getting better! I love her so much already! She's very kind, funny, young at heart, and flexible, and she treats us like queens. She is a single mom of two and her kids are grown and out of the house, she's a reflexologist as I mentioned, she's probably in her mid-50's and she great and I love her. We call her mami. She's adorable :)

I have already learned so much here; slang frases, new words, old words, how the city and it's people work, and it is such an interesting and lovable place. 

God is so good and so faithful.

I'll try to blog every week, but no promises. Just know that even if I don't talk/text/facetime/skype/blog a lot, i'm never not thinking about all of you and I love you and miss you all! Thank you for your continued encouragement and prayers, I feel them all the way over here!

I am so blessed and so grateful and will never lose the light of hope because it shines so brightly.

Hasta luego! Besitos a todos :)

Any questions? Ask me via facebook messenger!
Wanna come visit or wanna send mail and have me love you forever?
Address is......

Michaela Van Koevering
TCCSevilla
Calle Lagar, 6
41004 Sevilla
SPAIN

Adios America!

(Friendly reminder: read to the end to see how you can contact me!)

Well friends, today is the day! My bags are packed, paperwork is completed, tickets have been bought, and goodbyes have been said (except to the rents). I can't believe I packed my life for the next 3 1/2 months into a suitcase, cary-on, and backpack. Whaaaat?!

It honestly doesn't even feel real and I don't think it will until about 2 weeks in. I can't believe how quickly this day has come. I feel like it was just yesterday when I was accepted into the program in Sevilla, which was way back in March. Again, whaaaat?!

(<-- Throwback to the first time I went to Spain)

I can honestly say now that I feel 100% more excited than I did a few weeks ago. Instead of stressing about the money, the what if's, and just the general idea of being out of my country for 4 short months, I am praising God and more ecstatic than ever. God has been so extremely faithful it's insane.

About two months ago I was have major anxiety about leaving; this semester costs more than a whole year at Cornerstone for me. Yeah that was a huge hurdle to jump over and a big glass of water to swallow. In the beginning of summer I didn't think I'd be able to go. But now I can't really turn back and I know God provides.

Let me show ya how He does.
Late June/Early July
Day 1: At the gas station I found a nickle lying on the ground.
Day 2: Out shopping with my mom found a quarter when I stepped out of the car.
Day 3: Out to Costco with my mom and I found a dime and a penny.

By the end of the third day I realized that this was God's way of providing for me. They were such little amounts of change, but it all adds up. Now every time that I've gone out; to get gas, grocery shopping, regular shopping, or going out to eat, I have found spare change. And every time I did I thanked God because I knew it wasn't just luck, it was God showering me with gifts. God provides!

In the Bible in 1 Kings 19:11-12 it says, "The LORD said, 'Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by.' Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper."

God doesn't often speak loudly, it's usually through a gentle whisper, the small and quiet things, like finding spare change. But over the course of the past couple months I've probably found about $5 in spare change. Yeah, you may be saying it's only $5, but it's $5 more than I had!

So back to leaving the country; I'm leaving around 9:45am for the Chicago O'Hare airport today, yes today. Mom is dropping me off at the gas station where I'm meeting another girl who's going. And there is bound to be some ugly crying, I already did about 10 minutes ago saying goodbye to my daddy. My plane departs at 4:20pm Chicago time and we are arriving in Madrid, Spain at 7:30am their time. So, due to the time difference it will be about 1:30am our time. The flight is roughly 8 hours long. From Madrid we will take a train to Sevilla and we should arrive there between 2:00 and 3:00pm their time/8am our time. (From now on when/if I mention time, it'll be Spain time. Just subtract 6 hours for our time.)

I will do my best to let y'all know ASAP when I arrive!

For those of you who'd like to talk to me, see my face via skype/facetime, send me snail mail (which I adore!) Facebook will probably be your best option or email. The email I use mostly is, you ready for it? Don't judge, I made it when AIM instant messenger was a big deal. daddysgrl61996@aol.com
Otherwise facebook, Skype (michaelarea96), facetime, or mail!
My address will be:

Michaela Van Koevering
Calle Pagés del Corro, 71-4b
41010 Sevilla, España
(Make sure you include the tildes and accent marks!)

Thank you all so much for all your prayers, encouraging words, and constant love!
Love you all mucho! Cya in a few months!
Hasta Luego :)

To The Ones Who Say "Thank you"

To the ones who say “thank you”… Thank you.

Two simple words can mean so much.

A few days ago a co-work said to me, “Thank you for cooking supper. You go underappreciated around here.” They may have been serious or they may have been being sarcastic, but in that moment, those were exactly the words I needed to hear. I had been having a rough day, and work wasn’t making things any better, and I had been feeling very underappreciated. Just because I'm the cook I have it easy and I don't work as hard, at least that's what I had been told. But to know that someone did appreciate me that day was enough to transform a rough day into a good day. So to that co-worker, thank you for saying thank you.

Did you know that a person will tell 11 people about a bad experience, but only 4 people about a good one. No wonder there is so much negativity in this world! We should start boasting about our positive experiences rather than our negative ones.

It doesn’t take much to break something, but it takes a lot longer to put something back together. The same goes for people; it doesn’t take much to hurt someone, but it takes a lot longer to pick up those pieces and glue them back together.

Saying a simple thank you, taking a few extra minutes out of your day to sincerely ask how someone is doing, to simply smile, these things create moments of joy in someone’s life, including your own.

Mom, dad, thank you. For literally everything. Thank you for supporting me, putting me through Christian education, food, a home, the cabin, clothes, whatever I’ve ever needed you’ve provided. I could never thank you both enough for how hard you work to supply for our family. Thank you for supporting my dreams and encouraging me to pursue them. Thank you for coming to practically all of my volleyball games even when I never played. Thank you for my brother and for Julius. Thank you for all of the necessities and all of the luxuries. But most of all, thank you for always loving me even when I do not deserve it and even when I’ve screwed up.

Little Guy, thank you. For picking on me and beating me up. For locking me in my room and in a cooler, for making me stronger, for making me laugh. Thank you for being the protective brother I know that you are but don’t want to show. Thank you for always being honest and stating your opinion, even if it is brutal. Thank you for teaching me how to tie my shoes and letting me sneak across our room to your bed when we were younger to have farting and burping contests when we were supposed to be sleeping (PS: I always won) I love you, I do, and I’m happy and grateful that out of all the Eli's in the world, I'm stuck with you. You’re my favorite brother.

Grandmas and Grandpas, aunts and uncles, and cousins. Thank you for your constant love, support, and prayers, especially with my trip to Spain coming up soon. Thank you for being a part of our crazy family! I love you all and I'll miss you!

Friends; Jacquelyn Rochelle Kunst, Ellen Murielle Zylstra, Amanda Joy Kleinheksel, Naarah Ann Foster, Emmy Anna Shouse, Matthew Jesse Leo, Abby (insert middle name, I want to say Lynn?) Carlson, thank you. For always making time to spend quality time with me despite having your own lives and significant others. For making me laugh and laughing with me or at me. For letting me cry in your arms/in front of you. Thank you for helping me and walking with me through all life’s struggles. Thank you for loving me, the good and the bad parts of me. I love you and cherish all of you so dearly.

Co-workers, residents, and bosses, thank you. For allowing me to do my job and love what I am doing. Thank you for letting me take some time off so I can study in Spain! Thank you for being willing to pick up shifts and be flexible. Thank you for working together as a team so we can provide the best care for the old folks :) And for not treating any one job more important than another. Thank you for making my job so special. I love you all and I’m so grateful I have such great co-workers.

Everyone else, thank you. For being you, for being my friend/family/acquaintance. You are all in my life for a reason and I am in all of your lives for a reason. You are all so special and dearly loved by Abba.

Two simple words, "Thank you."

It’s all it takes.

1 Corinthians 12--> the body has many parts and no one part is more important than the other because they each play a specific role and one cannot operate without the other. 

Life's a Climb

Did anyone else plan their entire lives when they were younger? I know I sure did, and I still do. Married at 21, A big wedding in my backyard with sunflowers and blue dresses, and of course cowboy boots, and LOTS of dancing. Twins by 24, and a few years later a total of 6 kids, stable job with a big house on a farm in the country, in Michigan of course, and lots of animals. Retired by 60 so I can travel and explore with my husband while we're still young. I mean seriously, I have whole Pinterest boards dedicated to my wedding, kids, house, and future.


Then we grow up and find nothing turns out the way we expected and we have no idea what God is doing in our lives or even if He is doing anything. 

Last night I had a dream or vision, whatever it was it hit me deep, right where I needed to be hit. I was up north in the UP climbing up a mountain (because we all know there's definitely mountains up there.)  Parts of the mountain were made of sand, some rock, and some ice. But before I began to climb the mountain, someone read to me, from a book of each climb, every step I would take to get up that mountain. At one point they told me I would grab on to a slab of ice, which would break off and I would slip. I would fall a few feet down, but then I would reach out blindly and grab onto another piece of ice and I would be okay, just a few bumps, bruises, and scrapes, and I would be a little scared.

Well knowing that I was going to fall and not trusting that I would be okay, when I began to climb the mountain and came to that chunk of ice I grabbed onto it, chipped it off, and threw it down the side of the mountain. 

But as it turns out, that piece of ice and slipping was the only way for me to get up that mountain. I was stuck. Then I woke up.

Life and a relationship with God is so much like that. We have to climb these huge mountains in life without safety gear, trusting God along the way. Sometimes we will slip and fall and have to blindly reach out and grasp onto anything or anyone we can find. But in the end, we'll be okay. 

All the time I just want God to tell me what I'm going to encounter on my climb through life and how I can get through/over it. But if God actually did just tell us, or show us what is going to happen in our future, we would only become like God and try to alter our path. Those rough times might scare us and we would avoid them or try to get rid of them. But in the end, going through those scary or not so fun times, might be the only way we can make it up the mountain, make it through life. 

So the next time you question God's plan for you or you're in the midst of a trying time, know that He's got you. He's your safety gear and He will ALWAYS catch you WHEN you fall.

John 16:33 "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the wold." 
Proverbs 16:9 In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps.
Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Self-Image: The War We Fight Against Ourselves

Earlier this summer my mom and I went to the beach to see the kites at the kite festival in Grand Haven, and to people watch (one of our favorite hobbies). As we were people watching…and possibly eaves dropping… there were two girls, probably about 12-13 years old, walked past me. One girl was taller and slimmer and the other friend was shorter and not as slim (Not fat either!) As they walked by, the taller friend was saying how she was fat. (She was definitely NOT fat.) The shorter friend then said what anyone would say to a girl that age and that small, “you’re not fat!” and she was right. However, she went on to say, “you have a thigh gap. Stop, look, there is a huge gap in between your thighs. You’re not fat!” To which the other girl responded, “yeah, but compared to most other people I am.”

Well I have something to say to those two girls. Neither one of you are fat. Yes, you are built differently, but neither one of you are fat. Not even close. Time to sound cliché, but you are both built beautifully and in the image of God.

Body image is a war that we fight against ourselves. I mean, think about it. I admit, I compare myself to everyone I pass on the street. Wishing I was shorter, had longer hair, whiter teeth, a flatter stomach, and that ever famous thigh gap. But as I’m passing that girl on the street rocking the messy bun and shorts, she’s wishing she had nicer clothes like that girl shopping with her mom in the store. My point being, we are constantly comparing ourselves to someone who is “better” than us, while they are constantly comparing themselves to someone “better” than them. It’s an endless cycle.

Ephesians 2:10 (NLT) “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago.”

We are God’s MASTERPIECE!

Here’s a little poem thing I wrote a while ago. Read it. Seriously.

Masterpiece

Precisely painted

Carefully carved

Beautifully brought to life

                                    My Masterpiece.

Nothing can compare.

Mona Lisa, Statue of Liberty, Starry Night,

Nothing.

                                    My Masterpiece.

Yet you criticize, critique, kill my work.

Not good enough. Ugly. What were you thinking?

If only you knew what I know,

And could see what I see.

Then you would know that I know what I’m doing.

                                    My Masterpiece.

A slap to the face,

A jab to the heart.

That’s what I feel when you hate my art.

                                    My Masterpiece.

I love you.

Others marvel at you beauty.

Why can’t you see it too?

                                    My Masterpiece.

Turn around.

Look in the mirror.

See her?

She’s you.

                                    My Masterpiece.

Precisely painted

Carefully carved

Beautifully brought to life.

                                    My Masterpiece.

God spent so much time creating you. Before you were even conceived he was drawing, painting, and carving you. If we were to go tell Leonardo da Vinci that the Mona Lisa sucks and critique it saying how ugly she is and how it isn’t really a piece of art. Imagine how much that would hurt him. He spent so much time on her and he was so proud of his work. Well, that’s how God feels when we critique and judge not only others, but ourselves! We are God’s masterpiece.

So to the girls at the beach; neither of you are fat. You’re young and you have so much more to focus your attention on besides your self-image at such a young age. 

To everyone else; guys and girls, in the words of Aibileen Clark from The Help, "You is kind, you is smart, you is important." And I love you all mucho :)

My First Blog EVER-Enjoy :)

As some of you may have seen, a few days ago I posted a little blashphema (definitely a word) about my life on Instagram. I opened with this prayer by a man named Thomas Merton, we're close friends ;)

"My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore I will trust you always, though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone." (I bolded a few key phrases.)

This prayer was introduced to me by someone met a few years ago and it occasionally pops into my head, usually when I am feeling as if I am supporting the whole world on my back. On March 16, 2016, I was accepted to study abroad in Spain this fall! And I could not have been more ecstatic. Living in another country, away from home no less (no worry rents, I still love you, but I like being independent), studying another language and becoming fully immersed with the goal of becoming a Spanish Immersion Teacher, trying new foods, meeting new people, and traveling. All of these things sound great, right?! Well they did to me too. But as the time nears for me to leave (August 30th) I start feeling more and more anxious. I've been feeling as though I am in the ocean during a storm and just when I think I am going to get the chance to come up for a breath another wave crashes over me and pushes me farther and farther away from the surface.

A couple of days ago I listened to a sermon on line about living an anxiety free life. Psh okay, yeah right. Anxiety free life? Yeah, not possible. Sorry Mr. Preacher-man, but you're nuts. But wait, he then goes on to explain that we have no reasons to worry or be anxious or afraid. (Luke 12:22-34) Jesus lifts that anxiety from us, just like our sins, if we allow him. The pastor then goes on to point out that a fog that covers 7 city blocks equals less than a glass of water. A fog that covers 7 city blocks equals less than a glass of water! Yet that fog has the capacity to shut down the whole city. How similar is anxiety to that? Something that seems so small, like leaving to another country for 3 1/2 months, can shut down someone's entire life.

Going back to Thomas' prayer; I have NO idea where I'm going. Yes, I'm physically going to Sevilla, Spain for a semester to study Spanish. I will get there by airplane, train, and car. But where am I going emotionally, spiritually, even mentally? Life is filled with "I don't knows" and these passed few weeks I've been drowning in "I don't knows". I'm halfway through college and I don't know what I want to be when I "grow up", other than a wife and a mommy (to 30,000 children.) I don't know how I'm going to afford college, but does anyone really? I'm a Christian, but I don't know if I can continually trust God with MY life. I DON'T KNOW! 
But there is one thing that I know and that is the fact that God has this path laid out for my life and He's waiting for me to follow Him down that path.

Now I want to explain to you the difference between anxious and eager, because I often hear people confusing the two asking me if I'm anxious to leave for Spain, when they really mean eager. Yes I'm VERY anxious! And because I know my HS English teacher would be proud on this little grammar lesson :)

Anxious(dictionary.com): full of mental distress or uneasiness because of fear of danger or misfortune; greatly worried; solicitous--> or in Michaela's words; nervous
Eager (dictionary.com): Keen or ardent in desire or feeling; impatiently longing--> or again in my words; excited.

In the definition of 'eager' when it uses the word longing, does that remind anyone else of the Full House episode when Viper (DJ's newest boyfriend and Uncle Jesse's newest guitarist) is singing the line "longing for home" over and over again, trying to gain Uncle Jesse's approval. Longing for home. I have the feeling that in the next few months I am going to be longing for my home here in the Mitten. I know Spain is going to be the greatest opportunity of my life and that God has great things in store, but Ma, Pa, even you Little Guy, I'll miss y'all lots. But not only will I be longing for my home here, but also throughout my life I have been and will be continuing to long for my home with my Abba Father.

So, to those of you who have been patient enough to read through and keep up with my jumbled thoughts, thank you mucho! And I invite you to join me as I spit out my thoughts on things and also as I journey to Spain! (I'll try to give you, at least, weekly updates. Hopefully) Much love!

P.S. La Luz de Esperanza means The Light of Hope in Spanish. And I found it fitting to title my first ever blog in Spanish and I love the word Esperanza.